Faith

Faith…
What does the word Faith mean to you?
According to Wikipedia it means to have confident belief or truth or trustworthiness in one person, concept or thing.
I have always thought of our God when I think of faith.
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.
—Ephesians 2:8-9

When people ask me how do you know God is out there, how do you know he hears you, I always say I believe by my Faith. Don’t get me wrong, there have been numerous times, I thought for sure God was ignoring me, only because I had been ignoring him for so long. I am sure we all have had our faith rocked, I know I have had. Where things seem so bad and you cannot get from under it, you think I am all alone; God cannot help me through this. The problem is, we are not seeking God out during these times. I have a huge problem, because I like to be in control, with letting God take it and handle it. I am stubborn, and I am sure he is growing weary of the tug of war game we constantly play. Lord, know this, I am working on it.
I have lived through two divorces with my mom and dad, then my dad and step-mom, due to me being so young with my mom and dad’s divorce, I can’t remember being sad over it. With my dad and step-mom, it rocked me hard, I couldn’t believe after 17 years of marriage, it was over. That was the first time I had someone tell me I look through rose-colored glasses, because we were a life of dysfunction. Now when I look back on it, I see how all things involved were not good. I was so angry at God, I cried out to him, how can you let this happen, how can you tear this family apart. Why, God, Why, I cried this out every morning and every night, for months. I began to rebel, as you might say, and I had not a care in the world, I began to self-destruct, and if anyone got in my way they were coming down with me. This went on for awhile, then I hit rock bottom, almost lower than rock bottom, and I couldn’t do anything but cry out to God, please help me, please help me with this, because I cannot do it alone, and at the age of 21, I was saved. I was baptized at Country Woods Baptist Church in Byram, Ms, by Bro. Rob Futral, I will never forget that day, and it was so serene for me. I will not sit here and lie and say everything has been peaches and cream ever since, I lived through another dark time with Philip, the devil waged war on our lives, and for a short period of time, he won. After I couldn’t take it anymore, once again I cried out to God, please get me out of this, please I can’t go on like this, well God did get me out of this, he got both of us out of the situation we were in, he healed us, physically and spiritually.
So, on to the point, yes I have been rocked hard, I have been angry, I have cried out more over things than I care to, but no matter, whether I accepted it or not, God was always there, he never left me. I have pushed him to the side, numerous times, I have ignored his guidance, and taken over when I felt like he wasn’t moving fast enough, but every time he has shown me, He’s Got This, I need not worry. Have Faith and it will all work out. I have learned when I cry, God cries along with me. I am not alone, no matter how alone you might feel in this world, you will always have God. I do not envy people who do not God and Jesus Christ, but as my Christian duty, I know I need to try and bring someone to know our God and Jesus Christ and what they have done for us, and the great feeling it is to have them in your life. God gets all the glory in my life, and I am so thankful for my Faith, and that believing in my Faith enables me to know God is with me.

Lord, I pray for those who have not yet come to know you, which if there is one thing I can do as your child, to bring them to know you, please show me the way. I am thankful for the Faith I have, and thankful for having you in my life and that you will never leave me.
In Jesus Name I Pray
Amen.